Saturday, August 13, 2005

Weather report

Before I release Gyler and his weather predictions for the week of August 15th, I’d like to review last week’s report.

Gyler said, we’d have cooler temperatures at the beginning of the week and a nice weekend. Wrong! However, his torrential downpours of mid to late week were bang on, only not of the Noah proportions he anticipated.

I give him a 33% accuracy, above average for a weather man.

Now without further ado, the coming week weather report with Gyler Sperling.


Next week will be dry as a bone. Expect a few tumbleweeds to blow through town and an extreme water alert to be issued. In fact I strongly suggest you make an effort to recycle liquids by drinking your own pee, definitely don’t water your driveway...do you hear me people of Woodbridge?

These dry conditions coupled with yet another heat wave will be especially hard on small fur-bearing creatures. Don’t be surprised if you have the corpses of mice, rats and the odd hamster littering your roads like they’ve been run over by little, tiny, cars.

Seasonal conditions will return by Friday, but another freakish system promises to be here by the weekend causing a dip in temperatures so prepare to dress warmly.

Until next time, I'm Gyler Sperling.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

OMG I just saw a tumbleweed blow by...that guy, Guyler, (that's funny....guy Guyler), is really something.

Strange said...

That's why he gets the big bucks...and buys me coffee...and crack...and sleazy whores. Yup, he's something alright.