Fine! I’ll fill out this ridiculous questionnaire sent to me by a high ranking official who shall remain nameless. Let’s just say, he is currently running for re-election and leave it at that.
How many books do I own: Hundreds and hundreds. Too many to count. In fact, they all belong to my girl D. who is the reader in the family.
Latest Book Purchased: You mean people actually buy books? I thought Chapters was just a really big coffee house, like a super-sized Tim Hortons.
Last Book Read: Da Vinci Code- Dan Brown. Couldn't put it down, read it in five minutes. The guy writes almost as good as I do. *wink*
Five Most Important Books:
The Book of Mormon, transcribed by Joseph Smith. Certainly a must read for any serious pilgrim, this under-recognized North American classic is the bedrock for my serious exploration of mature spirituality and a relationship with the Supreme Being. Just follow the instructions in the front. Wow and interestingly enough, the same one is on the Mayor's list. Ooops....I mean that nameless guy.
The Bible. It kept me warm when I was freezing to death in the early years when I couldn't pay the heat and hydro. Come to think of it, I was on the street. But I digress. The Bible, now there's some good burnin'.
The Greek Myths, D’Aulaire. Holy Fuck! I was going to say anything by Dr. Suess, but Greek Myths won out. That's 3 for 3 with the Mayor. Maybe we were seperated at birth?
Astrology for Believers, by Isobel MacLeod. I knew there would be a discrepancy sooner or later.
Young Person's Guide to the Corral, by The Mayor of Mitchieville. Everything you need to know is in here. No stone left unturned. It teaches you home remedies for STDs, how to chew your arm off in the morning, how to make sure she's legal, and most importantly, training yourself not to think of them as ugly women, but average looking dudes.
Now I have to tag 5 more victims?......naw.
4 comments:
I was hoping you would continue this tag by selecting five others. It would amuse me.
Is no one amused by simple masturbation anymore?
The Corral book is a must read. Read a few pages a day while taking your penicillin, it's good for what ails ya!
I especially liked the chapter, "Does piercing your dick really help you pick up chicks who look like your ex-guitarist?"
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