Death wish list

I've been to, too many funerals over the last few months. The most recent was for a dear friend Nelson Da Silva who lived life like he knew it was ending. In fact, if someone had come to him and told him that February 20th 2005 would be his final day here among us, I don’t think he would have changed a damn thing. He would have been just as kind hearted, just as thoughtful and selfless, just as humorous and he would have partied just as hard. It makes me think of how I would deal with similar news if I knew. So in the spirit of the man we lost, I present to you 10 things I want to do before I die.

1) Lie naked in Times Square, (not that anyone would notice).
2) Visit a Gulag with a guy named Bubba Joe.
3) Eat sushi off Cate Blanchett’s naked body.
4) Pee in the water at Pottahawk as people walk by smiling. (Wait cross that one off the list)
5)......maybe it would be better if I put it down in song. Come on sing with me:

I’d go muff diving
I’d break some poor virgin’s hymen
I’d last 9.7 seconds on escort named Blue Sue
I’d poke my own rear
Just like Richard Geer
And I’d look at all the porn that money could buy
That’s what I would do if I could live like I was dying