Enough already

Ok I’m back...nice little getaway...did I miss anything? Oh right! The New Orleans thing....So now, "New Orleans is sinking," is not just a Tragically Hip song...

I’m not going to spend any more time on it. It’s been analyzed and covered to the point of nauseam. Although if you are a news whore, there’s some fine readin’ over on Mitchieville. I think the good Mayor actually flew some distressed evacuees up to the Great White North to help them out. The guy who wouldn't leave his pet pig behind was one, and I know Mike Brown the former head of FEMA was among them as well. Poor "Browny" as Bush calls him, lost his job to a cartoon character...Hey, Hey, Hey...it’s Thaaad Allen!

Goodbye to everyone’s little buddy Bob Denver. He’s finally getting off the island at age 70.

Who would have thought, Madonna would have problems in bed, but it’s true. Guy Ritchie snores and the Material Girl has moved into a separate bedroom. Hopefully that will keep them from at least doing another movie together....if we're lucky.

Air Canada are bringing back the metal knife, but only for the first class passengers. So, let me ask you this, you’re a terrorist, right?....I’m not actually inferring that you are a terrorist, just work with me on this....You’re a terrorist, and you know you are on a suicide mission. Now, even though you are expecting your gaggle of virgins when you get blown to Allah, you know you’re going to die? Put in a situation such as this, what do you do, hot shot?....What...would you...do? I’ll tell you. You'd fly first class....Bravo Air Canada...Bravo!

Les Mckeown, (if that’s not spelled right, it’s because I don’t have my teeth in), former lead singer for the Bay City Rollers....ah you remember him now don’t you? ( Is that a quivering clitoris I hear?) He’s in trouble by a nose....his own that is. Seems Les was caught with more....C O...C A I...N E ! Oh....how the somewhat-former-teenage-heart-throb-has been-mighty have fallen.

The newest craze? How about video headstones. Now you can leave your message from beyond the grave for all to see, and I thought my idea for a store where you could buy fruits and veggies and surf porn, called Market Flesh, was stupid.

Speaking of stupid, Paul Anka has released a new album, comprised of #1 rock songs done with a swing feel. If you haven’t heard him do "Jump" or "Smells like teen spirit," check it out. Good for a giggle....hey has anyone informed Pat Boone of this?

Toronto the boring? That’s what an online review stated for people traveling on business to our fair city. They said our food was dry, the weather cold, the nightlife bleak and the hockey team sucks....Hmmm I don’t see anything negative about that.

BTW The boring Toronto Film Festival is underway. Good luck trying to find accommodations within a nuclear blast radius of the downtown core. I believe the Mitchieville Super 8 still has rooms but that’s about it. With all the great stars coming to our city it makes sense. Toronto is considered the place to be to see the early Oscar contenders. Now, If you’ll excuse me I’m on my way downtown to see if I can catch a glimpse of Dabney Coleman.....jealous...