In honour of Slumdog Millionaire here is your Monday joke:
A guy says to his wife: "Darling, what would you do if I said I've won the lottery?"
Wife replies: "I'd take half then leave you."
Guy says: "Excellent! I had three numbers and won Ten Dollars. Here's five...now fuck-off!
This giggle brought to you courtesy of Dickie Sanchez. That is all.