Thursday, May 15, 2008

They sure didn't make stuff like this for dogs when I was a kid

The Dogone Doggy Thong

Not only does the Dogone Doggy Thong accentuate your canine's ample buttockal curvatures, but it actually has a practical usage (not that the first one isn't practical, dogs like to get attention at the beach, too). The thong is made of a charcoal cloth that is designed to neutralize any of your dog's anally-emitted odors. In other words, it's a magical diaper that captures dog farts and transforms them into non-hazardous air again.

One thing that is not for certain is whether or not it comes packaged with a doggy tramp-stamp butterfly tattoo and a propensity for making out with drunken frat boys.

What? No Pottahawk slogan?

Swarovski Dog Dresses

If you're filthy rich you may already be accustomed to the spirit-lifting practice of declaring, "Fuck the poor!"

But what about your pet? Seeing as they can't speak, it's your responsibility to show the world just what your pet thinks about the underprivileged by forcing them to wear a $3,000 crystal-studded dress.

Products like this can only lead to trouble with your dog. I'm talking, smoking, drinking, gambling, violence, and yes,.....RAPE!

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