Strangedaze: Another week that was

We have much ground to cover this week my friends, so strap in.....just let me check my notes here and see what I have to tell you.......hmm.....

Duck eats alien head......too "World News" tabloid......no

Liz Taylor would like you to know she’s not dead..... and Richard Burton would like you to know he still is........no

The more educated men are, the more they don’t want kids...... they also don't want pick-up trucks parked on their front lawn.........no

Smirnoff is coming out with new coolers targeted toward men........the more educated men I'll bet. After a few of those, you want pick-up trucks on your lawn......no

Pitt Jolie's baby's name means, "new messiah".......that's just swell and I'll bet she already has a 3 picture deal too.....no

The Dollar Store will soon have stock publically traded.......will it be available for a dollar I wonder?....no

Don’t smoke em if ya got em

A province wide smoking ban went into effect May 31st. It prohibits lighting up in any enclosed area even if it’s a semi-covered patio. Many believe this will lead to an underground procreation of smoking rooms not unlike the speak-easys of the prohibition era, where those who wish can get together and indulge in their vices.

These private smoking establishments will only be the first, as soon the smoke-easy will be joined by the cancer-easy and finally the death-easy.

Barbie wins over Barbie

Mattel lost it’s much publicized court case against a Montreal steak house named Barbie's over a weakening of the brand.

The judge in the case sided with the restaurant sighting the two companies offered vastly different products to consumers. He stated that although you could put a Barbie on the barbie at Barbie's, you still wouldn't want to eat one........I don’t know. When I was younger, I had a G.I. Joe that ate a few Barbies.

Would you like fries with that?

A woman in the Netherlands found a live frog in her salad. No one’s sure whether it was a joke by a fast food employ, or a stunt by the woman to extort money from the establishment....not unlike our next hero from Wisconsin who’s brain storm to squeeze cash out of Taco Bell ended in misery.

He was charged for putting a dead mouse in his burrito. To make matters worse he let his girlfriend be the recipient of the delicacy. Now he’s not only in trouble with the law he’s single.

Dude did you learn nothing from the Wendy’s incident. It’s suppose to be a human
finger...idiot.

So far, big fish no catch for the boatmen

Ricky Williams played his first game as an Argo friday night against the Hamilton Ti-cats and was held to only 7 yards, which I feel is pretty good for his debut in the CFL. After all it’s just 2 short of the whole nine yards.

Pillow talk

A bar in downtown Toronto is putting out a call to all able bodied, young, moistened, delectable, delicious women, with more than ample mammalian protuberances, to join a new league.

The league will consist of teams who must pillow fight each other in front of an enthusiastic audience.....what no jello?

Fast and the furious it ain't

Surprisingly four people were not injured when they tried to drive their Toyota under a transport truck last Monday while traveling down the DVP. The driver of the truck was as stunned as anyone as the crushed vehicle somehow pulled free of the wreckage and drove off with crushed roof, smashed windshield and four flat tires.

Police found the car and it’s occupants not far away, hiding in back of a factory, and charged the driver with impaired.......I guess there's no charge for stupidity?

Wraps can make you money

gotgas.ca will pay you up to $450 a month if you are willing to have your car wrapped in an advertisement.

Sounds like a great deal...and what do I care...I won’t have to look at the coke bottle I’ll be driving.....

The one catch? You have to drive a gazzillon clicks a month.

Kind of fucks up the km’s on your lease doesn’t it? Not to mention the money they pay you will just go to the gas you need to drive around anyway......oh yeah sign me up.

Mommas don't let your babies grow up to be Mohammeds

The police raided the homes of a suspected Canadian terrorist cell this week, arresting those involved.

It is believed the al-Qaeda-like operation had designs on causing havoc in the southern Ontario region, mainly with attacks on the CN Tower and the transit system.

Perhaps they even had plans to launch an attack on the subway system last Monday, but were thwarted by the TTC wildcat strike and couldn’t get a bus downtown.

Give me a $100 on the bee

Did you know you could bet on the spelling bee? It's true. Vegas gave 4-9 odds the winner would be male, 3-9 he would be a geeky mofo, and an over-under of 10.5 letters on the winning word.

The winner was 13 year-old Katharine Close who correctly spelled "ursprache."

Everyone seemed to be fuckin' nuts and pissin' crazy over this whole deal. So much so, I thought I would start the first annual Strangedaze Spelling Bee. You are all welcome to participate......here goes.

Spell for me the word, "fucoxanthin.".........Hey! You cheated!

This isn't going to work at all.