Saturday, April 26, 2008

Blade gets tax trinity

Wesley Snipes was sentenced to 3 years in prison Thursday for failing to file tax returns, and a victory for prosecutors who sought to make an example of the action star.

U.S. District Judge William Terrell Hodges said Snipes exhibited a "history of contempt over a period of time" for U.S. tax laws, and granted prosecutors the sentence they requested — one year for each of Snipes' convictions of willfully failing to file a tax return from 1999-2001.

Three years on the inside...ouch! Does that mean he'll be known as the Gay Blade when he comes out?

Get off yer arse!

A new survey has revealed that British people spend more than 36 years of their life on their bums.

Are you listening Wesley.....You only have to spend the next three years on yours.

The poll conducted on over 2000 adults by a British Skin Foundation Sanex has shown that Britons spend most of their time sitting down.

According to Mirror, Brits spend 22 hours and 54 minutes every week sitting in front of the television.

They spend 21 hours and 48 minutes sitting in front of their computer and two hours and 35 minutes every week on the toilet.

I know a few people who would wreck the stats on toilet duration.

These shoes were made for grow├Čn`

If you ever cursed your kid for growing out of his, or her shoes too quickly never fear.

Built right into INCHworm shoes is the iFit technology. The iFit technology allows you to GROW the size of the shoe with a simple push of the button. So eliminate unnecessary trips to the shoe store and provide your children with better fitting shoes that last up to three sizes longer.

Of course, it costs three times as much.

Inchworm shoes grow in half size increments. Just push the button on the side, and pull the toe of the shoe to adjust into the next size.

You know I have to ask it. What about condoms.......

Ei Caramba (part 1)

The Simpsons has been banned in Venezuela by President Hugo Chavez, because the animated TV show is "unsuitable for children."

Have you seen it lately? It's unsuitable for everyone. Jump the shark already!

The long-running cartoon has been replaced after Chavez deemed it contained "messages that go against the whole education of boys, girls and adolescents."

Elba Guillen, a spokesperson for Televen TV, the Venezuelan network that airs The Simpsons, says, "It had to be taken off. The government considers it to be a series that isn't appropriate for that time because it isn't appropriate for children."

I agree. Children of Venezuela need to be out in the streets amid the protests and the violence. Bravo Chavez....Bravo!

Ei Caramba (part 2)

Rescuers reached a cluster of brightly colored helium party balloons floating in the ocean off Brazil's coast Tuesday but did not find the Roman Catholic priest who had been using them in a bid to set a flight record.

Man you just can't write shit like this.

Rev. Adelir Antonio di Carli remained missing after lifting off from the port city of Paranagua on Sunday strapped to hundreds of helium-filled balloons in a bid to break a record for the longest time in-flight using party balloons. He was wearing a helmet, aluminum thermal flight suit, water proof coveralls and parachute.

He planned to use the money raised in his attempt to break the 19-hour record to fund a "spiritual" rest-stop for truckers in Paranagua, home to Brazil's largest grain port.

I guess the practical question at this point is: Should I cancel the helium balloon priest I have booked for my nephew's birthday party next week?

Up, up and away, in my beautiful, my beautiful balloo....ahhhhhhhh!

cross-posted on Mitchieville

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