However, Woody Allen said, "tragedy plus time equals humour". So I imagine, somewhere down the line, someone will have something to say about the whole mess, but it won't be this week, and it won't be here. Besides, when you have someone like Mark Foley running around Capitol Hill trying to get it on with young pages, who needs the Amish?
Hey kid you want to see the Washington Monument?
House Republican leaders struggled Monday to contain the political fallout as more sexually charged electronic banter between Rep. Mark Foley and teenage pages emerged.
While conceding that Foley had inappropriate communications with pages and former pages, attorney David Roth said Foley had "never, ever had an inappropriate sexual contact with a minor in his life."
"He is absolutely, positively not a pedophile," Roth said.
I guess we'll have to wait for Foley's autobiography, "Rectum? Damn near killed him," to find out the real truth.
Get your freak on
Wednesday was the most entertaining night in the Big Smoke that we've had in sometime.
NO, not because it's the start of hockey season and the Leafs once again stunk out the joint in front of many a sushi eating, high-tax-bracket, suit-wearing, BlackBerry using, Non- Amish Bay streeter, nor was it due to the season premier of "Lost" or the baseball playoffs.
It was because, the circus has come to town, or in other words, the first mayoral debate for the Toronto municipal election took place, featuring all the candidates....well 28 out of the 39 anyway. Some in capes, others in bright purple suits, or costumes of one sort or another.
It's too bad it won't be a closer race as I would look forward to holistic healing for everyone, or joining the federation of planets, or calling a twenty-three year-old Mayor....but that's just me.
Penguins get rimmed!
I bet I have your attention at least, but the tag line is nowhere near as sinister as it sounds and it doesn’t involve Mark Foley. Nor does it come with a voice-over by Morgan Freeman- "Sadly...(pause)...the screeching penguins progeny....(pause)...were bound tautly.....(pause)....separated from their mothers and forced to bend forward....(pause) their beaks....(pause) now scarcely positioned inches from the ice.....(pause)....Awaiting a terrible wet decent from above.
Jim Balsillie, the billionaire owner of Waterloo's RIM (Research In Motion) and creator of the BlackBerry, has bought the Pittsburgh Penguins.
Hey, how long before he moves the team to Kitchener/Waterloo, calls them the BlackBerries and puts an Octoberfest sausage crest on the sweater?
It would still be better than Buffalo Sabre's new Donald Trump hair-piece logo.
Water, water everywhere
So drink it, and stop pouring your money down the drain on bottled water.
Especially "Walkerton Crystal Clear"
Toronto has one of the best filtration systems and rigorous testing analysis in the world.
Very rarely will I get a floater coming out of the tap.
A Nobel causeSo they'll give out the big prize next Friday. The Nobel Peace Prize that is. But what many don't know is there are also awards given for the weird and wacky called the Ig Nobel Prize.
Like the guys who won for their work on itches you can' t scratch. Or the guy who invented the mosquito, a device emitting a frequency only teens can here that acts as a repellent to keep them away.
I wonder if that's the same guy who just invented the cell phone that screams when it's stolen?
Others of note who have been lucky enough to win this prize include.
The person who invented a flame-throwing car alarm.
Another who made it possible to rent the entire country of Liechtenstein for parties.
And a pair of televangelists who discovered that black holes qualify as the location of hell.
A team that published a paper titled "An Analysis of the Forces Required to Drag Sheep over Various Surfaces."
And Troy Hurtubise of North Bay, Ontario, who created and personally tested a 147 pound grizzly bear-proof armor suit. (pictured)
All may have wished for a Nobel Prize, but they got an Ig Nobel instead.
What happens in Vegas....
Hugh Hefner has just opened a new Playboy Club in the city of sin. What' s next. I suppose they' ll be auctioning off Hitler' s watercolors......what? They already did that?....Ok I suppose they' ll be auctioning off Cher memorabilia then.
Cher and Cher alike
Cher is auctioning off some of her stuff. At first, it was just to be some outfits and wigs, you know, tour/ Oscar/ nightclub memorabilia.
However, due to the overwhelming response, the lot size has increased three fold. She has added furniture, bed linens, used dental floss, table scraps, and several pets....no Ritchie Sambora was not among those listed. Some of the items in question are even under priced to make them more feasible for her fan base.
The collective squeals of joy you hear are from gay men everywhere......not that there's anything wrong with that.
New Release this week: Evanesence-The Open Door ....All right ya got me. Technically it was from last week, but what the hell.
But I recommend.At play with The Platmates.
On their way to an internet cafe' to bid on Cher Memorabilia, no doubt.
Almost forgot
Have a happy Thanksgiving......unless you're from the States, then a shout out to Columbus Day....unless you're from somewhere else, then just enjoy your Monday.....
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