Saturday, May 19, 2007

Don't move! Or the bitch gets it!


Dogs are being kidnapped at an alarming rate, some even at gun point. Especially purebred Yorkshire terriers which can fetch (no pun intended) up to $2,000 each.

$2,000? For a Yorkie?.........Fuuuuuck......Why?....All that dog does is eat, shit, sleep, yap, and make more Yorkshire terriers.

Pirates of the Atlantic

Deep-sea explorers said Friday they have mined what could be the richest shipwreck treasure in history, bringing home 17 tons of colonial-era silver and gold coins from an undisclosed site in the Atlantic Ocean. Estimated value: $500 million.

Wow!......That would buy you a shit load of Yorkshire Terriers.


Tinky Winky gets the last laugh

Tinky Winky may be gay, but Jerry Falwell's dead...game, set, match....In your face God.

Now on to more important news like....Have they finished building that Hooker Haven on Toronto Island yet? And how to unlock your car door with a tennis ball.


Ham-as's- M-O-U-S-E

A program using a Mickey Mouse-like character to urge Palestinian children to fight Israel and the West and work for world Islamic domination has been pulled off a Hamas TV station for review.

Palestinian Information Minister Mustafa Barghouti said the use of the cartoon character in such a role represented a "mistaken approach" to the Palestinian struggle against Israeli occupation.

But you be the judge. Is it just me or does the militant mouse sound strangely similar to those recordings of Osama bin Laden?



No wonder Prince Harry's not going to Iraq.

The ratings game

Smoking will be a bigger factor in determining film ratings, the Motion Picture Association of America said but critics state the move does not go far enough to discourage teens from taking up the habit.

That adds smoking to a list of such factors as sex, violence and language in determining the MPAA’s G, PG, PG-13, R and NC-17 ratings.

However, I hear they have backed off their original assessment coming to a more reasonable compromise. Now a film will only receive the new rating if it involves a vagina smoking a cigarette.

Little Willy Willy won't

For those of you who were hoping to poke Prince William on Facebook, forget it. It was a hoax.

First the General Lee now this.

"Facebook removes any content that is in violation of our terms of use, including fake profiles," a Facebook spokeswoman told Fox News "After investigating the profile for William Wales, we found that it was a fake profile and we removed it from the site. We encourage users to report any violations of our terms."

No wonder Prince Harry's not going to Iraq.....

You don't know Diddley

Come on...sing with me....

Bo Diddley clearly was not himself,
His speech recognition was on the shelf,
When all his ailments finally broke,
Poor Bo Diddley done had a stroke,

Bo Diddley almost bought the farm,
Shoulda been aware bout the pain in his arm,
Rushed to a hospital, put em in a bed,
Otherwise Bo might’ve wound up dead,

Hey bo diddley, oh bo diddley,
Hey bo diddley, oh bo diddley.

Now he’s havin' trouble can’t speak, can’t talk,
sure can’t play no guitar rock,
With a little improvement day by day
You might hear the doctors say:

Hey bo diddley, oh bo diddley,
Hey bo diddley, oh bo diddley.

Heeeeey!

Happy Days the musical? What is the world coming to?

No wonder Prince Harry's not going to Iraq.

Can no one out there rub two brains together and come up with an original idea for theatre?

Apparently not.

We have to rehash ABBA and Queen, pick the bones of Dr. Seuss, adapt Hairspray and Dirty Dancing. Why, there’s even a Spiderman musical in the works. Outside of the theme song I can’t see how that will work?

So, trying to stay one step ahead of the so-called "creative genius", I'd like to present:

Musicals I’d pay to see.

Quentin Tarantino presents "Stuck in the Middle With You"
300 -the Musical
Terminator on the Roof

And

Musicals I wouldn’t pay to see.

Pirates of the Opera "At Worlds End"
Les MiserabLove Boat
Mama Mia Farrow

Iraqnophobia

LONDON) — Britain's Prince Harry will not be sent with his unit to Iraq, Britain's top general said Wednesday, citing specific threats to the third in line to the throne.

Army Chief of Staff Gen. Sir Richard Dannatt said the changing situation on the ground exposed the prince to too much danger.

"There have been a number of specific threats, (not to mention Hamas Mice) some reported and some not reported, that relate directly to Prince Harry as an individual," Dannatt said. "These threats exposed him and those around him to a degree of risk I considered unacceptable."

Didn't see that coming.

Cross posted on Mitchieville

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