10-Year-Old You Says: Freddy Krueger used to kill children so all the parents in the town burned his house down. Then Freddy came back in their kid's dreams and would kill them using this cool knife glove. He kills them in their sleep, but they die in real life. And their parents don't believe that Freddy's killing them cause they think they're just nightmares. Then the girl sets her alarm so she'll wake up right as she's fighting Freddy and bring him into the real world so her cop dad can arrest Freddy and send him to jail. But instead she has to kill him with all these traps she set for him in her house, but Freddy kills her mom anyway before he dies.
24-Year-Old You Says: Dude! Johnny Depp totally got his ass handed to him this movie! That was, by far, the best part. My gf has this super huge crush on him, so it was awesome to see him get sucked into that bed and turned into that spout of blood. When I saw that I went up to her and was all, "Where's your boyfriend now, huh? You still think he's hot when he's all blood and shit coming out of that bed?" She just told me to shut up and didn't give me any nookie that night. That sucked, but it was still worth seeing that pretty boy get what was coming to him. My one problem with this movie, though, is why does Freddy talk all the time? He's trying to be some kind of corny-ass joke-telling comedian instead of slicing the shit out of dudes like Johnny Depp. If he would've shut the hell up for two seconds he could've killed the shit out of Depp 10 minutes into this flick. I think that Robert Englund guy still goes around to conventions dressed as Freddy. That's so sad. Get a life, dude.
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