Book of the week club #1

...or maybe that should be "Book of the weak club"?

And the rest of the worst

Kristen Ritter

Madmen's Cristina Hendricks

Madonna....ick!

Best of the rest

A few weeks back I posted what I thought were the best and worst of celebrity feet...a hard choice in both cases.

Here are some of the best that for one reason, or another didn't make it into the top best feet.

Maybe next time.... Deborah Ann Woll

Mila Kunis

Katy Perry

Dad's desert island records #6

Numbering Tuesday

The 50 coolest staircases. You really have nothing else to do, do you?

The 5 best plane crashes in cinematic history.

15 bizarre foods.

WTF in school books #8

Sunday sex advice

Simple Yes or No Sex Answers

We've received thousands of questions from readers and we try to answer as many as possible with detailed and helpful responses. However, some questions can be dispatched more quickly. Here are 25 quick answers to questions we've received.

Dear SD,
A friend of mine said you can tell if a girl is a virgin by the way she walks. Is there actually a way to tell if a girl is a virgin or not by the way she walks?
Anonymous, Texas

No.

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Dear SD,
Is it safe to swallow my own cum?
Anonymous, U.S.

Yes.

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Dear SD,
I have tried to suck my own dick, but can only barely lick it. I have only tried it once. Is that good progress?
Anonymous, U.S.

Yes.

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Dear SD,
It really takes a lot of work for a girl to shave everything "clean." Is it OK if it’s just kept short and trimmed?
Anonymous, U. Conn

Yes.

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Dear SD,
Is it possible to break your penis, so that it’s difficult to have sexual intercourse or get erections?
J.J., Florida

Yes.

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Dear SD,
If I masturbate and cum on my hands, then wash my hands thoroughly with soap and water, and then four to five hours later finger my girlfriend, is it possible that sperm residue can get my girlfriend pregnant?
Doug, U.S.

No.

---

Dear SD,
Is it normal for a straight guy to shave his cock and balls?
Anonymous, Orange County

Yes.

---

Dear SD,
Is it true that frequent masturbation can cause your penis to shrink?
Jeff, U.S.

No.

---

Dear SD,
My boyfriend wants me to say his name while having sex. Is this normal?
Anonymous, U.S.

Yes.

---

Dear SD,
If I give a guy head and I swallow, can I become pregnant?
Anonymous, U.S.

No.

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Dear SD,
My girlfriend is always up for new things...so, what she wants to try is sex in a hot tub. Is that normal? And is that okay to do?
Alex, U.S.

Yes. (it is normal)

Indeterminate (we don't know if it's completely safe to do) [Note: we've received a lot of queries about this. There is some concern that a condom might be more likely to slip off or break in a hot tub, and we think this is a legitimate concern. Some have also suggested that sex in the hot tub will push bacteria-laden water up into the vagina causing infection. We have no evidence that this is a likely scenario, however, we've received a lot of emails about this, so we will leave this an open question.]

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Dear SD,
Is it normal for a guy to finger his own ass?
Anonymous, Florida

Yes.

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Dear SD,
Is it normal to like to taste of your own cum?
Ryan, Ohio

Yes.

---

Dear SD,
My boyfriend caught me masturbating. I said, “I'm sorry and I'll stop. But he just said, “No, no. That's alright. You can continue.” So I did. He sat there watching me. After about a minute, he suggested sex. Is it normal to get turned on by watching somebody masturbate?
Katie, U.S.

Yes.

---

Dear SD,
I feel a little embarrassed asking this, but is there any way possible to tit-fuck? My girlfriend has huge tits and wants to see if I find any pleasure by fucking them...is that even possible?
Chris, N.Y.

Yes. Yes.

---

Dear SD,
My girlfriend and I had sex recently (I was wearing a condom...of course). But when we were done...she noticed that my condom was broken. Is there a chance she won't get pregnant?
James, California

Yes.

---

Dear SD,
I’m a girl and I’m so hairy down there, if I take it away it always comes back the same day. Is it normal to have hair around your asshole?
Anonymous, U.S.

Yes.

---

Dear SD,
I have hair on the shaft of my penis almost half way up. It’s not a lot of hair but a little. Is this normal?
Jan, Oslo

Yes.

---

Dear SD,
I discovered I am bisexual. Is this bad to love cock & pussy?
Rick, Virginia

No.

---

Dear SD,
I went home to see my parents and my girlfriend not too long ago. Well, my girlfriend is pregnant. (I'm the father -- we both know that). But see, she still wants to have sex. Is that safe?
Alex, Texas

Yes.

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Dear SD,
Is it safe to beat off twice a day?
Anonymous, L.A.

Yes.

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Dear SD,
Is there anything wrong about my girlfriend being afraid to be handcuffed to the bed?
Elvis, N.Y.

No.

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Dear SD,
My boyfriend likes me to play with his ass during sex. Is this normal?
Anonymous, N.Y.

Yes.

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Dear SD,
Can you get a girl pregnant if you do her in the ass?
Anonymous, U.S.

Yes.

Note: we've received a few queries about this answer. The concern is that the sperm may leak out of the rectum and into the vagina causing pregnancy. This may be unlikely but is probably not impossible. Here's a comment we received from one reader: "YES. My 4th is living proof."

---

Dear SD,
Do tits get bigger after sex?
Dan, Miami

No.

This Saturday is numbered

The 10 most expensive beers.

10 ways to get free wi-fi anywhere you go.

The 9 most brilliant pieces of comedy hiding on youtube.

Dad's desert island records #5

WTF in school books #7

Celebrating the new with the old

With the release of the new Rush album last week, I thought it might be cool to explore YYZ done acapella.

The Tuesday numbers

6 mind blowing effects you won`t believe aren`t CGI.

6 famous news stories that forgot to tell you the best part.

5 iconic pop culture moments improvised at the last second.

Dad's desert island records #4

Sunday sex advice

10 Worst Handjob Mistakes

A handjob should be one of life's simple pleasures, but it often ends up as little more than a chafed disaster. Here are some tips to avoid common handjob pitfalls. Print out this list and keep it next to the sofa or tape it to the dashboard of your car.

1. Doing it dry
   If you don't want a sore, red, inflamed cock after all is said and done, use some lube. Unless you have extraordinarily soft skin or are a maestro of the cock fiddle, rubbing a dry cock will just make it raw. If you don’t have any KY Jelly or hand lotion handy, you can at least use the natural bodily fluid most readily available: saliva. As long as you can work up a mouthful of spit, there’s no excuse for a dry handjob.
2. Unrelated chatter
   Focus on the task at hand! No chatting on the cell phone with your friends or musing about dinner plans. Permissible topics of discussion include: how huge his cock feels in your hand, how wet he is making you, and how desperately you want him to come all over your face.
3. Fingernails
   Long, pointy, or roughly cut fingernails present a handjob hazard. They can poke, scrape, pinch, and gouge if you’re not careful. Accidents are most likely to happen when you’re moving too fast, so if you have long nails, take it slow and be careful. Fingernails can be used to good effect if you use them very lightly to caress or tickle his cock and balls. Using the backs, not the tips or edges, is recommended. If you’re not sure what you’re doing, don’t try, just keep them out of the way.
4. No rhythm
   In order to be pleasurable and build arousal to a climax, a handjob should have rhythm and continuity. It’s best to start slow and then steadily increase the pace till he pops off. Don’t stop and start or speed up and slow down randomly or for no reason. Once you start a handjob, you really have to keep at it until it’s over, or you lose the momentum (and he’ll lose his erection). Keep your hands on his dick, and keep them moving till he comes.
5. Limp grip
   When you shake hands with someone and their hand feels like a limp, dead fish, it’s creepy and unpleasant. Now imagine how it would feel to have that hand on your dick. Definitely not a turn on. A weak grip conveys lack of confidence, lack of enthusiasm for the job, or just downright distaste about touching a cock. It’s even worse if your hands are also cold and clammy. A weak grip combined with lackluster movement is the kiss of death for a hand job. Grasp his cock firmly (but not too firmly – see our next item) and stroke vigorously (but not too vigorously).
6. Vise grip
   Grabbing his cock in a death-grip is also a huge handjob mistake. A light but firm grasp is adequate. Remember, “choking the chicken” is just an expression. Putting a stranglehold on his cock is counterproductive. Also, while it can feel good to have the outer skin of the dick pulled back and forth over the shaft, you really need to move your hands over the surface too - don’t just grab one spot and start jerking up and down.
7. Wearing rings
   This is a no-brainer. You need to take off your rings before you give a hand job. They don’t “add sensation” – or they do, but the wrong kind. Rings can scratch and bump the delicate skin of the cock. They’re distracting. And they can get caught in his pubic hair. Needless to say, if you’re wearing a wedding or engagement ring, this goes double.
8. Nut crunching
   Unless he specifically says that he likes it rough, don’t squeeze, pull, or twist his nutsack. This can be painful. Many guys like to have their balls massaged, rubbed, or gently tugged during a handjob. But don’t grab them and knead them like a stress-ball. A light touch is best.
9. Smoking
   Smoking during a handjob is the kind of thing you might expect from a cheap hooker with a bad attitude, but don’t be surprised if you also encounter it from a party girl wasted on too many Slippery Nipples. In any case, we can’t emphasize this enough: Cigarettes and handjobs do not mix. Guys, don’t ever let anyone holding a burning object anywhere near your crotch. Smoldering ashes in the groin, scorch marks on the dick, blazing pubes - the potential for tragedy is just too great.
10. Not Cleaning Up After
    A good handjob should leave your man glowing in a state of relaxed post-ejaculatory bliss. And it will also leave a mess, gobs of jism, lube, and pubic hair. Keep a hot, wet towel at the ready, or at least a tissue, to clean up afterwards. Nothing will ruin his good mood more than having to deal with the aftermath himself.

WTF in school books #6

The ugliest celebrity foot countdown #1

That's right, Victoria Beckham. I guess David isn't a foot guy or else he would have been out of there a long time ago.

Dad's desert island records #3

The ugliest celebrity foot countdown #2

Really, is there anything nice to say about Tilda Swinton? Now you know the answer is "no".

WTF in school books #5

Monday by the numbers

12 stupid ways people died going to the bathroom.

5 scientific explanations for you sexual perversions.

The 50 dirtiest town names in the world.

Sunday sex advice

10 Worst Blowjob Mistakes

1. Teeth
   
   The number one blowjob mistake: letting your teeth hit his cock. We can't stress this enough. Ask any guy and he'll tell you again and again: nothing is worse than a blowjob that is "all teeth". In fact, most guys won't admit it, but their idea of a perfect blowjob would be getting sucked off by a gorgeous woman with removable dentures. Teeth can nick and scrape the sensitive skin of the penis. Open your mouth wide enough that they stay away from his cock, or suck your lips in over them to cushion the rough edges. If he's wearing a condom during the blowjob this may provide a slight buffer, but don't count on it.
   
2. Going too fast
   
   Some guys enjoy a quickie, but unless they're in a hurry to get back to work or back to their wife/girlfriend, most men like to savor the experience of getting their cock sucked. So don't rush them. It's not a race to see how fast you can get him to spurt. Take your time and make it last. Concentrate on different parts of his penis, or his balls, then go back to basic sucking and stroking. At the end of a luxuriant BJ session, he'll blow a much larger, more satisfying load.
   
3. Sucking too hard
   
   Hoovering him like a dustbuster may seem like a good idea in theory, but there's a wrong way to do it. Don't fasten your mouth around the head of his cock and suck like you're trying to get a triple-thick milkshake though a straw. Guys' dickheads are the most sensitive part of the penis, and uncut guys are even more sensitive there. The proper technique to hoover is to take more of his cock into your mouth and apply moderate suction.
   
4. Crushing his nuts
   
   Don't grab his balls and squeeze like you're trying to crack walnuts. This is a move you want to pull on a would-be rapist, not a guy you're trying to get off. It's painful. Many guys like to have their sack rubbed, licked, or gently tugged during a bj. You can even take a break from sucking his cock to take one or both of his balls into your mouth. But don't yank on the family jewels, and don't put them in a vise grip.
   
5. Barfing and gagging
   
   Throwing up while giving a bj is definitely a turn-off, although sometimes this happens to the most well-intentioned cocksuckers. What happens is they get overenthusiastic, take the cock too deep or hard into their throat, the gag reflex gets triggered, and then it's all over. Or once the cum starts hitting the back of her throat, things start flowing the wrong way. Don't try to deep throat on your first BJ. Everyone will be sorry. Practice first on dildos to get your gag-reflex under control. Or just work up to it at your own speed.
   
6. Remaining immobile
   
   Putting his cock in your mouth and then doing nothing is as bad as overdoing it. Most guys don't want to feel like they're face-fucking a cadaver. You need to work it at least a little. A total lack of effort or enthusiasm on your part is a real buzz kill. If you don't know what to do with your tongue, at least bob your head. After a while, he may want to take a more active role and have you relax while he fucks your mouth, but you need to give him a little encouragement to get him aroused.
   
7. Not using enough pressure
   
   Wimpy blowjobs are no fun. Be firm and suck him like you mean it. Lapping his dick lightly will just make him feel teased. Licking his dick like it's a lollipop or popsicle may be fun to get warmed up, but then you have to get down to business. Use a firm (but not too firm) hand to work the shaft of his cock, while you get your mouth all over his knob and caress it with your tongue.
   
8. Spitting
   
   Most guys want you to swallow and think that a BJ really isn't complete until his load goes down your throat. The only exception is if he gets off more on spraying it on your face, tits, or somewhere else. If you really don't want to swallow, this can be an acceptable compromise. Symbolically, swallowing shows that you accept him and his manly essence fully. Although we can't endorse unprotected bodily fluid exchange in any form, if you happen to be giving an unprotected blowjob (i.e., without a condom) and you end up with his spunk in your mouth, do not retch his cum into a wastebasket in front of him. If you really feel you must spit, do it discreetly into a towel or tissue.
   
9. Dry mouth
   
   A good BJ involves a lot of saliva. Don't be afraid to get a little sloppy and drool on his cock. If your mouth is dry from nervousness or whatever, there will be too much friction and stickiness to give good head. If your mouth is dry, drink some water and rinse. Try to work up a good mouthful of spit before you go down. Suck on a hard candy to get your juice flowing, or suck on an Altoid to give him a mentholated BJ.
   
10. Stranglehold
    
    Don't put his cock in a deathgrip. It's fine to wrap a hand around the shaft, but don't clench and for god's sake, watch the nails. Just hold it enough to keep it from flopping around and shuck his pole with your hand while you work him with your mouth. His dick shouldn't have a handprint on in when you're done.

The ugliest celebrity foot countdown #3

Katherine Heigl...wait...it's also the entire cast of women on Grey's Anatomy. There's not a good looking foot on the entire show. I know Heigl left to persue a movie career, but that's no excuse. She still easily fits into the top 10.

WTF in school books #4

Gone in 60 seconds

One for the Queen.

Dad's desert island records #2

The ugliest celebrity foot countdown #4

Sorry Mariska Hargitay, but that is one ugly foot. Those toes standout like a trucker in a police line-up of drag queens and easily earn you the #4 ugliest foot in Hollywood.

WTF in school books #3

Sunday sex advice

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The ugliest celebrity foot countdown #5

Have you ever heard the expression,"it takes two"? Well today I have feet that are just horrific, but it takes Hayden Panettiere's right foot and Jennifer Garner's left foot to make that Frankenstein.

The Mayans were right #6