Seriously you could fry an egg on the sidewalk. Monday it would have been done in 17 minutes. By Wednesday the fuckin’ eggs were hopping back into the shell it was so God damn hot. But patience my peeps. Just a few more months, and relief will be here. We can go back to the weather we all know and love.At least there seems to be a break in all this heat as if prayers were answered.
"God bless Mommy and Daddy and Ontario Hydro
Thank God for New York, where we’ve been importing power from, I guess they're not as self-centered as I thought they were. And Michigan. It’s only fair we give them our garbage. And Quebec. Hey you should thank us for giving all your strippers jobs. And Ohio....Ohio...um...O..hi...o....give me a week I’ll think of something. Amen."
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