Friday, April 24, 2009

I've been busy...does it show?

If you are a regular visitor to Strangedaze- all eleven of you- might have noticed through the week these pages have been a little sparse of content.

It's not that I have lost my passion to do this, although it may seem I have. It's just, there are only so many minutes you can squeeze out of a testicle in the course of the day.

Time is a commodity at the moment that everyone seems to be buying my shares.

I'm sure things will return to a normal pace over the next month or so and I'll be back to annoying you on a regular schedule.

Sunday, April 19, 2009

You pets are on drugs #5

A busy week by the numbers

The 10 most amazing Japanese game show moments.

The 11 best cat puking videos on the internet.

The 55 most disturbing toys ever made.

100 famous movie lines in 200 seconds.

You pets are on drugs #4

Again with the tips

Yup! That's right for those who are still having problems swallowing the motherload, here are more tips to help you reach the promised land.

Just put your tongue above the penis, and let it flow! - Anonymous, U. S.

My tip is to stick the cock at the very back of your throat when he is going to cum and let it roll down your throat. This way the girl will taste nothing, maybe a little aftertaste, but that can be solved easily....and the guy enjoys his whole cock in your mouth. I do it all the time. - Anonymous, Canada -

I got this hint from my mother (of all people). She told me to control the "gag" reflex when trying to deep throat, squirt a little Chloraseptic in the back of your throat before going down on your man. I could never even come close to deep throating my guy till I tried this trick, but it worked fantastic! Not to say that it still wasn't a little uncomfortable, but the reaction from my man was more than enough for me. He was completely amazed. More than a year later, I don't need the Chloraseptic anymore and he thinks I am his own little sex star. - Kim, U. S.

Don't breathe through your nose when it is time to swallow... it cuts WAY down on the taste factor to make it palatable. - Anonymous, Gainesville

I find that swallowing slowly makes me gag less than swallowing fast. - Anonymous, Atlanta

The first time I swallowed, my husband had been drinking Jack Daniels and coke. Since I was pregnant, I was just drinking a coke. I was going down and had never swallowed before. He had cum in my mouth before, but the taste made me sick, so I didn't DARE swallow! Well, after getting it on for a while, he asked me to suck his dick again. I did and was I surprised when he moaned very loudly and shuddered! He had cum in my mouth, and as a reflex, I swallowed. I didn't even taste it, due to the aftertaste of the coke! Anyone who is not sure should try it! Also, flavored, water-based lubricant is absolutely wonderful! You don't taste anything but sweetness! - Heather, North Carolina

All you can really do is swallow A.S.A.P., and after a few swallows of your own spit, the taste should be gone. I actually don't like deep throating because then the taste goes straight to the bitter-tasting taste buds of your tongue, and that's usually where the taste stays. If you just have him cum into the center of your mouth then swallow, the semen will just quickly flow down and the taste doesn't linger. - Bianca, Detroit

Watch out for the power shooter! Sometimes guys shoot with great force. If he blows a healthy load, you may find yourself choking on his goodness. If your guy fires forcefully just pull back a bit - it'll help you from gagging on his cum. - Kyle, North Carolina

Get the guy to go vegetarian. The cum will be sweet and not bitter. - Anonymous, U. S.

My girlfriend always gets me to eat a lot of pineapple the day before she gives me a blowjob. She says it really makes my cum taste sweet. Whatever, no complaints, she's the boss!! All I know is I'm getting a lot more head than I normally would and I couldn't be happier!! - Anonymous, Calgary

I hated swallowing my boyfriend's cum until I just focused on the pleasure it was giving him. I just put the taste of it out of my mind and swallowed. At first it was gross, I will admit, but after a few times I really started to enjoy it. - Anonymous, Ohio

Saturday, April 11, 2009

So this is Easter

And the dilemma is, should I post something Easter related or the worst robot sword fight ever filmed?

Hmmm...Easter?.....Worst robot sword fight ever filmed?

Another 10 BJ tips

I barely tried swallowing because of one bad taste experience, but now I always have a glass with Coca Cola ready. After swallowing I drink some cola and it really helps getting rid of the aftertaste. - Joyce, Holland

I like to throw my head back as though I'm drinking a shot. - TD, Maryland

Blokes, swallow some yourself one day, that way you are showing that there really is nothing wrong with it. She may find it wrong to swallow but (let's face it) most guys are very uncomfortable with this taboo. She'll feel a little silly for wondering why she never did it. - M., London

If you deep throat you can barely taste it, not that it tastes bad. I rather enjoy the satisfaction of a job well done. - Anonymous, U. S.

Just close you eyes and swallow fast like your taking meds. - Anonymous, U.S.

Ten seconds of yuck doesn't equal ten minutes. Remember, men usually are up to their eyelashes in a woman's juices - so women shouldn't complain about a teaspoon! - Anonymous, Canada

Swallowing my man's cum has never been an issue with me. It's something I've always enjoyed. He inserts his penis inside my mouth and puts it all the way in and then moves back and forth until he explodes in my mouth. I sometimes spit it into a glass and then drink it down. Sometimes I put his cum in my coffee cup; it's better than cream. I would never spit my man's cum out. That would be totally wrong and would make your man think you didn't like it. The taste of cum is a bit different. However, it's not as hard to take as you think and if you really have a problem with the taste there's always mouthwash. - Amy, U. S.

If you don't like to swallow, just ask your boyfriend if it's OK if you have a drink next to the bed. You can come up with an excuse like, "Giving blowjobs makes my mouth dry," or just say you like to have a drink afterwards. You could also tell him the truth, but you'll never know how he's gonna take it (it might be insulting). When you have just swallowed, give him a smile and wait a few seconds before reaching over to your drink to get the sperm-taste out of your mouth. Hardly any man will notice. - Anonymous, Holland

I always found whenever I was receiving a blow job, my 'muff' got in the way, but I never thought anything of it until I was giving the nickname Muffy, my actual name being Murphy. I found that if I give myself a little trim down there, it appears to increase the size of your organ. And if your lover does swallow, she won't choke on anything. My girlfriend liked it a lot more as well. - Muffy, England

Just get his dick far down your throat when he cums! It's brilliant because you miss the taste (if you do not like it - I personally do), and it goes straight down your throat. Plus the boy will really like it. - Minerva, U. K.

Thursday, April 09, 2009

Wednesday, April 08, 2009

Do you know the Wicker Man?

Never one to miss an opportunity to post something from one of the funniest movies of all time....The Wicker Man....I will yet again appease you with Nick Cage and Beethoven's Fifth.

Tuesday, April 07, 2009

Saturday, April 04, 2009

The 10's unit

The 10 funniest trailer mash-ups.

The 10 funniest 911 calls.

The 10 greatest South Park characters of alltime.

The 10 funniest Freudian slips.

Last of the wood



Leg Up

It’s not uncommon to have an erection that curves to one side or the other. If yours does this, you’ll need to compensate accordingly. Use the bathroom walls to brace yourself as you balance on one foot and tilt your body until your curve is pointing down toward the toilet bowl. You might want to install a grab bar by the toilet if you do this regularly.



Superman

If you're a man of steel in the morning, you might as well be a superhero. Tie on the bedsheet for a cape, mount the bowl in a single bound, and make like you're flying. Hopefully the pressure relief will be like Kryptonite for your boner.

Friday, April 03, 2009

You pets are on drugs #2

With a link to the evidence of course.

That is all.

Thursday, April 02, 2009

Adding up the numbers

Before they were celebrities they made commercials. Here are 10 of the most embarrassing.

Before they were homeless....wait....that doesn't make any sense. Here are 50 of the funniest homeless signs. Not that there's really anything funny about being homeless, but what the hey.

After they were Rockstars they did some pretty crazy shit. Here are 10 of the craziest Rockstar sex stories ever told.

Wednesday, April 01, 2009

Black humour for a blue Fool's Day,

A woman successfully gives birth after several hours of labor. The doctor takes the baby and leaves the room to perform some tests. Several minutes later, the doctor returns with the baby in his arms and then suddenly begins to punch it, kick it, throw it about the room and slam it against an adjacent wall. The woman screams, "OH MY GOD WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO MY BABY?!" To which the doctor replies, "April Fool's! It was already dead!"